Living with Carnivores

A vegetarian human's adventure with cats

Category: Human-animal interaction

Cookie Jar

The kitties each get 2 raw freeze-dried treats from the “cookie jar” in the morning. This temporarily fills big holes in little tummies and buys the human a bit of time to get their soft food prepared before the yowling begins.  Originally, the human used to toss treats around on the floor and invite each cat to go chase down the snacks. Most would literally hunker down and stare at the human as if she was crazy. Even when the human managed to successfully get a snack to land right beside a cat, the cat usually could not be bothered to turn and nibble. However, if the human kneels down on the floor and puts all the treats out in front of the cats, then they are happy to eat. While one could never really say they are well behaved as the human prepares to divvy up snacks, they are remarkably restrained given how they act at other times.The trick is not to stay and enjoy watching them nosh on their nibbles, but to quickly put the lid back on and run to the kitchen and get the soft food prepared as soon as possible. Some mornings the human remembers the bigger goal; some mornings she just enjoys watching the penta pack enjoy their treats. Those days she deserves the yowling that follows.

 

 

(c) Copyright 2018, PeggyMalnati. All rights reserved. Photos my own.

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Why are You Bothering Me?

Needless to say, the human didn’t have a good answer…or at least one that was acceptable to Miss Mu.

 

(c) Copyright 2018, PeggyMalnati. All rights reserved. Photos my own.

What is that Lump?

The other morning, the human spied a lump under the furry blanket on the bed.  Notice the tail tip sticking out? Now who could that be?Ah, wouldn’t you know it’s Pepe!

 

(c) Copyright 2018, PeggyMalnati. All rights reserved. Photos my own.

How to Help a Sick Human Recover

Ah, your human is waylaid with influenza? That’s bad luck on your part as that means she’ll be focused on her own survival and not on your whims and desires.  The trick is to help your human recover so quickly that she once again returns to her role of faithful servant.  Here are some pointers.

  1. Do settle your 18 lb bulk on the human’s ribs and chest — all the better if you’re pressing down on one lung. The human will thank you later for helping strengthen her breathing.
  2. Push your face up really close to the human’s. Make sure your whiskers tickle her face.  Breathe on her (even if it means she breathes on you too). Reach out and lick her chin.  If she still doesn’t respond, step on her chin with one of your paws and press down. Guaranteed that will make her sit up.
  3. If she’s whimpering in a fetal curl, walk up and down her achy hips and legs. That may help ease some of her joint pain. Or not.
  4. If you can get her to lift the covers so you can slide under, fall asleep in her arms. When you wake up, make sure to reach up and poke her in the face. You want to make sure she’s still breathing.
  5. Human not doling out snacks and pets? Jump up on her and push your fluffy fur into her face.  That will help her breathe better.  Try clawing the pillows around her face to see if she responds.
  6. Yowl every 3 hours for food even if there are 3 kinds of food already laid out on the floor. (You can’t seriously be expected to have to eat old food from dirty bowls.) This way she doesn’t fall into a coma (or get much sleep).  If she cusses and snarls from her deathbed about all the food that’s out on the floor, jump up on her in bed and sing a song.  She’ll relax and stop the bad behavior. Just as she’s about to fall asleep, jump on her bladder or walk on her head. The latter is always helpful with influenza, since her head feel like it’s caught in a giant pair of vice grips anyway. Yelling will make her headache worse and will intensify the pain in every corner of her skull, including her teeth.  You’ve done your job. She’s still alive!
  7. Tag team her with your best pals.  Make sure she is surrounded and that everyone is singing songs to help her feel better.  Lull her back to sleep…for the moment.  Then repeat the above.

(c) Copyright 2018, PeggyMalnati. All rights reserved. Photos my own.

Finally, a New Cat Bed Gets a Lodger

Remember the two new kitty beds the human dragged home after Thanksgiving? Well, it would be an understatement to say they have not gotten a lot of love. Despite their incredibly plush interior and the opportunities each offers for a kitty person to hide in plain sight, they have had little use as proper beds.  (The human got them on clearance, so therein may lie the problem.)Pepe does love to attack the pompoms on the blue one that looks like a jewelry pouch. In fact, he batted the decorations so hard that he split the thread holding one of the poms together, then had a grand time chasing the fibrous ball of fluff that had been inside. (It’s since been lost, so no go on the human fixing it unless she wants to buy a big bag of fiberfill just to fix a single pompom.)However, the triangular/teepee-shaped bed finally got a visitor. The human spied the inhabitant, flipped on the light, and edged ever closer with the camera, much to the annoyance of the feline in question. It’s behavior like this that earns the human scowls!

Happy New Year, one and all. Thanks for following the antics of the meows over the last 12 months.

 

(c) Copyright 2017, PeggyMalnati. All rights reserved. Photos my own.

Rolling Out the Feathers

The silly human found a down comforter she’d put away and forgotten about. She pulled it out, fluffed it up, and added it to the bed.  Of course, Pepe had to come along and make sure that the feathers were properly aligned and not too fluffy. It’s a good thing someone’s watching out for the 2-legged. Clearly, she can’t figure out these things on her own.

(c) Copyright 2017, PeggyMalnati. All rights reserved. Photos my own.

Crazy Kitties

Let’s be honest. Cats hate change even more than humans do. And when they have a lot of change in their environment over a short period of time, it can sometimes lead to interesting forms of acting out.  So the human brought this on herself.  She decided to flip the furniture in her bedroom on Thanksgiving Day. What had been on the west wall is now on the east, and vice versa.  Of course, while this was all going on, the evil vacuum cleaner was busy sucking up all kinds of things, so the cats stayed far away. Later, after the noise quieted down, things were put to right, and the far-infrared mattress pad was turned back on on the freshly made bed, the cats appeared and began to check things out.  Talk about curious!  One after another they jumped up on the bed, sniffed and looked around, then jumped down only to jump up on a different piece of furniture to explore. Clearly they were quite at a loss as to why the human would do such a radical thing without asking their permission. To further intensify things, the human had washed a bunch of their fleece blankets and hung them out to dry, then brought them inside (smelling of the great outdoors) and put them back in their kitty beds. They love it when they have clean, fresh-smelling blankets!  That evening, there were some mighty interesting and noisy goings on in the house. Fireball ran around chirping loudly and even tried shredding the mattress foundation under the human’s head.  Caesar alternated whacking the ball around on the scratching disc and chasing other cats around playing tag.  Mac tried out 3 different kitty beds in their new locations much like Goldilocks visiting the three bears.  And Pepe and Corky chased each other quite loudly. It was a regular circus that went on until about 2 am. Fortunately, the cats have settled down now and seem to enjoy the slightly modified sleeping arrangements. Still, what was the human doing making a change like that without asking?

 

(c) Copyright 2017, PeggyMalnati. All rights reserved. Photos my own.

New Fuzzy Blankets are Well Received

Well, the human did one thing correctly for the holidays. She picked up 2 more fleece remnants at the fabric store and put them in the main kitty beds on the human’s bed. The new fuzzy blankets are colorful and fluffy, so everyone seems to like them a lot.  In fact, between the extra layer of blankets and the far-infrared mattress pad, it’s hard to get the cats out of the kitty nest in the morning for breakfast. Of course, if they hadn’t gotten the human up at 3 am for food, they probably would be hungrier and therefore more incentivized to eat at the proper time (and the human would be better rested).

(c) Copyright 2017, PeggyMalnati. All rights reserved. Photos my own.

Missing Lush Grass

The felines aren’t happy with the human at the moment. They’ve had no fresh organic wheatgrass to nosh on for over 10 days and the plants that are left are pretty bedraggled. The furry people are definitely pining for a new pot of fresh greenery. Still, the human’s been hard-pressed to get out of trouble as each time she goes into the grocery store to get more grass, the store has been out of it.  Never mind that she’s visited 4 times in the last 10 days, that doesn’t cut it in this household. <<Bad human servant, bad!>>  New kitty beds, new kitty foods, and new kitty blankets be darned. Keep this up and the human will be fired.

 

 

(c) Copyright 2017, PeggyMalnati. All rights reserved. Photos my own.

White Mousy goes Dumpster Diving

The toy mice have been having great parties at night this week.  The human is greatly entertained with the places she finds them when she picks up each morning. Pink mousy showed up beside the smaller crunchy bowl upstairs, while orange mousy was close to climbing into the medium-sized litter box. Back into the toy box they go, only to reemerge for new adventures the next night. The other morning, white mousy went for a dive in one of the food bowls. The cats had nothing good to say about that meal offering, so hopefully at least someone enjoyed the food. Unfortunately, after sitting in a bowl of soppy soft food all night, white mousy is looking a bit worse for wear — even after a bath. Time for the human to clean out the three kitty toy boxes and see what else might need to be recycled.

 

(c) Copyright 2017, PeggyMalnati. All rights reserved. Photos my own.