<<<First the evil human used the even more evil clippers on Caesar and then she used them on me. Look what she did to my beautiful nails! Is there no authority protecting bodily sanctity here? Okay, so maybe I was shredding the legs of her mahogany bed when she didn’t get up and refill my crunchy bowl at 2 am. Hey, I can’t eat out of it when the bottom is showing. Besides, how are these things even remotely comparable ?>>>
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